Some of my childhood dreams are flying in an airplane and visit big cities with skyscrapers. I wanted them badly. It doesn’t matter if I have to trade my leisure time for study hard wishing those dreams will come true through good education. I was waiting for the time I might get out from the little town where I grew up.
Some of those childhood dreams are come to realization now. Some moments in my life happened beyond my daydream. I can fly with airplane until it becomes a must and not a pleasure. I can visit big cities and live in a metropolis. I’m out from my sweet little town and be fortunate if I can go back and visit it once a year. Life pretty much an achievement compare to a dream of a little girl.
So much so, it doesn’t instantly making me happier as I would think way back then. Suddenly I really miss what I’ve been away to for so long. I miss the freshness of the air and the smell
of the soil after a rainy day. It was lovely to see a plant near my bedroom window sprouted a flower. I enjoyed when the chilly tree grow after I spread seeds few days before. I love the smell of the tomato fruit when it turns green to red. I even miss some insect that scared me to death of their appearance. And I never thought that I will also miss the neighborhood where everybody know who is doing what.
Now, I dream to have a farm where I can raise my own crops and livestock. After living in the city for so long, I almost never eat something without chemical. How I love to eat a fresh egg from its hen and drink a mango juice that I pick myself from its tree. I also dream to have a pond full of my favorite fish, since eating fish is a fancy treat now.
I question, is life evolving or rotating? The deeper desire inside our heart never fulfilled. We always long for something we don’t have and crave to have something we missed. In that sense, life is not really about achieving our dream. Instead life is about enjoying the process of achieving it. It is about attitude and gratitude.
I’m still in that process, looking forward to future and the blank pages of my days. I wish that I can paint masterpieces on those papers and never be regret about them. Still love to get back what I’ve traded to fulfill my childhood dreams but never be sorry about it. It’s the price I have to pay.
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